Just for your amusement. Or perhaps a wake-up call for some ;-)

Started by Gyppo, June 18, 2019, 11:28:52 AM

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        "Fellow writers, ask yourself this question.  Could you - as a writer - give up writing?"

        Prompted by the following quote, found whilst reading newsgroup messages.  'Caffeine isn't addictive as long as you keep taking it.'  It made me stop and think for a couple of micro-seconds...  (Then - fingers trembling - I reached for my keyboard...


        "My name is John and I'm an addict..."

        I can drink loads of coffee at bed time and it doesn't stop me from sleeping.  Does this mean I'm immune, or just that I'm so deeply addicted it just doesn't touch me anymore?

        By the same token I can eat cheese or pork pies for supper and not experience any of the horrific nightmares which both of these foodstuffs are alleged to cause.  But then I don't - generally - suffer nightmares; my personal demons - when they do haunt me - tend to take the form of daytime flashbacks.  Very disconcerting at times, but not quite so difficult to cope with in daylight.  Maybe the demons haven't realised I no longer work nights ;-)

        Maybe it's all a (mostly) beneficial spin-off from when I used to get so hyped up about work that I learned to hypnotize myself into sleeping.  I could be fast sleep within three minutes of getting naked.  Obviously this would have precluded working as a juggler at a nudist camp ;-)  Or as a nudist sky-diver...

        And yes, I did nearly drown in the bath until I learned to wear my Hippy headband, and no, I didn't need to wear one sock during lovemaking.  But if that headband could talk I'd have to take it out and kill it ;-)

        I can drink hot chocolate in the early hours at work, circa 5-30 am and it doesn't make me sleepy, yet the people around me say that the smell, or even the mere thought of it, makes them semi-comatose.

        I once went on a survival course where as far as caffeine was concerned I went 'cold turkey' for a week.  After only eighteen hours without liquids during that long hot August week I would almost have killed for water, but it didn't need to taste of coffee.  Lukewarm water - grubby with 'survival fingers' - carried back to camp in a condom (I kid you not) tasted magical ;-)

        Caffeine addictive?  Not for me.  We have one of those comfortable long term relationships which easily survives protracted absences.

        But...  God alone knows what would happen to me if I had to give up my keyboard or pen!  Like most prolific writers I suffer from severe 'Caged Beast Syndrome' if anyone tries to stop me when my Muse is in full flow.  I've never (fortunately) had to write on a cell wall with my own blood or excrement in the absence of any other medium, but I don't doubt that I would.

        There, I've admitted my word addiction, just 26 little letters and a handful of punctuation marks, all of which can be mixed in a magical and never ending variety of ways.  Good plain words or erudite and eclectic cocktails, I thirst for them all with an unquenchable passion.

        It is said that if a true writer has to choose between his marriage/relationship and his words there is no contest.  I've never had to make that choice, but will admit to saying (more than once) "Just let me finish up the page, then I'll be up to bed, Love..."  Then - three hours or so later - easing back down from a writer's high, gently tucking the blankets around my sleeping lady, and going back to the processor with only a mild twinge of guilt.

        Having just read that I can see how 'kids stuff' like caffeine doesn't get a look in.  And - unlike some addictions - I don't want to find a cure.

        So when I'm stopped on the streets at 2am, being pat-searched by an over-enthusiastic copper who is becoming infuriated at his inability to find anything incriminating in my pockets, I can't help smiling.

        "Something amusing you...  Sir...?"

        "No Officer, just a bit ticklish, that's all."

        Just the thought that 'possession of words' is the biggest buzz in the whole world, and, better still, they can't touch me for it ;-)

        Copyright J Craggs, 2003


Funny you should mention coffee addiction Gyp. I haven't touched the stuff since I started the chemo. If someone hadda told me that I'd one day give up coffee and take up 'the bag', I wudda spat a laugh in their face. But no . . . horror upon horror, I'm now a confirmed Tetley's man. Incidentally, Tetley's also do a Fruity concoction that when added to the old H2o makes a lovely refreshing drink.

But words.

I still get that old familiar rush of joy when I turn on the 'memo' app on my phone and my fingers fly over the keys.
Or when I turn on my pc, load up a word doc and a virgin, blank page, lies there spread out before me, and I know I'm gonna infect its virginity with a flourish of sentences, periods and the dreaded over-use of the comma (scourge of all writers).

Everything else can be given the old 'heave-ho'. But words . . . NEVER.

Interesting article.


My heart (and the rest of me) belongs to the Northeast of England.