Author Topic: A smile from the archives.  (Read 106 times)

Gyppo

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A smile from the archives.
« on: March 19, 2021, 09:37:40 PM »
There are certain problems in life which only a writer can face, understand, and then solve.  For example...

I spent nearly twenty minutes sat here trying to take my hat off, nearly breaking my neck in the process.  Then I realised I'd inadvertently hit the [Caps Lock] key.

A while back my lady was having trouble getting undressed for bed until we realised her [Shift Lock] was down.

And she was bitterly disappointed to realise that leaning over my shoulder and pressing the [Insert] key didn't immediately make her the centre of attention rather than what I was writing.

[Home] doesn't teleport unwanted guests back to their own residence.  (If only...)

[Alt], rather fortunately, doesn't realign your gender by 180 degrees.

[Ctrl], disappointingly,  is nowhere near as powerful as the name suggests.

[Page Up] and [Page Down] may serve some useful function in a Royal setting, but I wouldn't know.

[Pause] will sometimes cause a dyslexic cat to appear and start mauling at your keyboard.

The various arrow keys will not, under normal circumstances, turn you into a target for some crazed toxophilite.

As for the 'f' keys, they're a law unto themselves and shouldn't be mentioned in polite society.

Gyppo