Bad Thing/Good Thing

[DGSquared]

When you returned home from work that day, you learned your mother-in-law committed fraud and has been denied her remaining pension. Now penniless, she's come to live with you and your spouse at your expense.



My latest watercolor painting turned out pretty good, probably the best I've ever created.

[Firefly]

But when placed at a certain angle, resembled male genitalia so was removed from the church art exhibition and you were banned for life with three hail Mary's and one Our Father

The rain broke the drought

[DGSquared]

But it hasn't stopped raining and Noah fed the instructions on how to build an ark to the goats.


The hills are covered in flowers.

[Firefly]

Now I take an antihistamine every day for the hay fever

I threw a party for the family

[Jo Bannister]

...and damn it, they came - every one of them!

You only have one family...  No, wait, that's both a bad thing and a good thing!

My family always remember my birthday.

[Firefly]

But they turn up with no presents and expect you to have the cake

I went on a balloon ride yesterday

[Dansinger]

And fell out of the bloody thing.

On the bright side, I only broke both legs and several ribs.

[Firefly]

While in hospital the doctor read the chart wrong and plastered up both my arms instead

But that was fine, my doctor was cute and had a nice butt

[Dansinger]

and he was gay.

But the hospital food didn't taste bad.

[Noizchild]

(That actually isn't bad if you are a gay man yourself. )

It's made from people.

Trump is impeached!

[Firefly]

But buys his freedom

The ice-cream van stopped at my house

[Gyppo]

But it only stopped because it had run off the road and smashed through into my office, destroying my much-loved desk, computer, and all the files.  And the driver bled all over my paper copies, which were then condemned as a health hazard and incinerated.

However, I have off-site backups stored on a massive hard drive in my shed.

[Dansinger]

Unfortunately, the shed isn't insulated and moisture killed that hard drive.

On the bright side, I've got lots of fresh ideas swimming around in my head.

[Firefly]

Until I was cornered by a Hexenbiest and she sucked all of those ideas right outa me and used them for her evil plans

Lucky I emailed the list to my mother

[Spell Chick]

... my confused and Alzheimer ravaged mother who threw the things away.



But I've bought lots and lots of legal pads and newly sharpened pencils and can start from literal scratch again.